This was my final project for my InDesign class this semester. It’s an instruction manual I’ve titled, “How to Attend Concerts For Amateurs (Who Don’t Want to Look Like Amateurs)”
We were asked to create an instruction manual on whatever topic we wanted, and I chose this because I enjoy concerts
and I also enjoy being sarcastic.
Here’s the way it turned out:

It’s a booklet that folds into 8 pages when cut and folded correctly.
Since the text is so small, this is what it says:
How to Attend Concerts
For Amateurs
(Who Don’t Want to Look Like Amateurs)
by Aubrey Wilkinson
Let’s be honest, concert attendance is an art – an art requiring a
specific skill set and knowledge that must be honed if one is ever to achieve the status of
professional concert-goer.
Luckily for you, you’ve stumbled upon the instruction manual
containing golden knowledge
nuggets in the form of six easy steps on how to look like a professional when attending a concert instead of an amateur wannabe.
Lace up your Chucks, button your skinny jeans, and keep your hands and arms inside the mosh pit.
Here we go.
Step 1: Prep
Just like every good scout, every good concert-goer must be prepared.
| The essentials: |
| • Pre-acquired knowledge of the venue layout and the best available parking (get an insider’s input if you are new at this… or just pretend you meant to walk 3 miles from car to venue) |
| • I.D. and ca$h |
| • Water in the car for your parched throat afterwards |
| • Know the band’s stuff before going. If research is necessary so you can say to your friends, “Did you know that this song is actually about his obese cat?” it will instantly put you a step ahead of the game |
| • Always purchase tickets before the show. You’ll go through the faster line and most likely save a couple Washingtons. |
Step 2: The Look
A word of CAUTION: Never wear the t-shirt of the band you are going to see. It’s bad luck and you look like a 12 year-old fan-girl/boy that the pros will instantly judge.
Legit scenesters typically rock the tee of a classic indie-respected band, the tee with the most obscure music reference they can dig up, something socially ironic, something vintage and Mr. Rogers-y, or a deep V.
Glasses and hats are not essential, but are considered safe bonus items. Trendy black nerd glasses subtly scream, “I’m deeper than you,” to everyone around you. Skinny jeans and tennis shoes (i.e. Chucks or something neon that doesn’t match) are safe bets. Make sure shoes are comfortable and dirty-able, or you’ll hate yourself. And definitely ensure that your shirt is sweat-friendly.
These rules can be unisex, but girls may want to look like something straight out of an Urban Outfitters catalog instead and be considered totally “hawt.”
Step 3: Make Your Entrance
Every concert pro knows that no concert ever starts on time. If doors are at 7, you get there at 8. You’ll still catch the openers because the line of teenagers around the block will have been shuffling in during the sound check.
Note: make it on time to see The openers, as they often have the potential to be the best part of the show for you. why? because that’s where you gain knowledge for street indie music cred after the show is long over. That band with 20 members, trumpets, glockenspiels, and a name that sounds like they tortured a dictionary until the 2 most random words fell out of it will be your golden ticket to respect when you can say you loved them way before anybody knew who they were.. and then you can snootily gripe when they make it big about how much better they were before they sold out.
Step 4: Location Selection
as in real estate, your choice of location can play a big part in your level of enjoyment. decide beforehand if you wanna be on the floor in the mass of action or a sit on the balcony and look on knowingly while enjoying your beverage. If you aren’t sure, the only method for decision is experience, and you’ll have to try both spots.
For in-the-crowd-ers: You must not be afraid to be aggressive. maximum concert experience can only be achieved by pushing through to optimal location. Get as close to the band as possible (behind someone as short-ish), and expect to get touched on all sides the entire time and leave as a sweaty monkey. You may choose to mosh if you wish.
For observers: If this is not a venue large enough for assigned seating (the best concerts are smaller scale), you’ll need to pounce on a prime spot asap or you’ll end up squished awkwardly next to the big girl in the spaghetti strap top getting toasted and screaming obscenities or “I love you!” to the lead singer. Being next to a railing you can lean on is ideal. If the venue does not have multiple levels, you’ll want to pick a comfy spot behind the crazed crowd where you can get a decent view and sound.
Step 5: Enjoy
Revel in the experience. Going to a concert is about connecting with the band. This is the moment when the sound and lights and lyrics wash over you and soak through your pretentious glasses to make you remember why you’re in love with music. This is why you came. This is when you forget about
anything but this moment.
and if you’re too stuck up to dance.. you take yourself too seriously.
Step 6: (Meet the Band) and Depart
Purchase merch if you wish. Lesser-known bands especially need that support. Also, merch tables are prime locations for meeting bands… and meeting bands makes concert
experiences about 85.9 times better than they otherwise would have been. Not to mention, if you really want to be “scene,” you’ll be “in” with the bands. Credibility doubles when you hit that level. Get your photos if desired, but be cool. There’s no need to go all Beiber fever on these people.
And then take your leave, buzzed from the sheer high of great music.
Congrats.. you’re no longer
an amateur.
Tags: black and white, graphic design, photography